Can Jesus Really Be My Valentine?

It made me uncomfortable to even write that heading. But keeping in theme with this year’s blog series of difficult–or uncomfortable–questions and this month’s “love series,” I guess that’s how I should be feeling. I’m recalling a time my sister and her friends made t-shirts on Valentine’s Day when they were freshman in college. In iron-on pink and red letters the t-shirt displayed, you guessed it: “JESUS IS MY VALENTINE.” At the time, they were single and confident in that singleness.

But that phrase irks me. Calling Jesus my Valentine turns him into a guy in jeans and a polo who likes me and buys me pretty flowers to say so. I love flowers. But Jesus doesn’t give me flowers. He made a big sacrifice that changed everything forever and that’s way more serious than a dozen roses.

But maybe I’m missing out on a side of Jesus my sister and her friends knew in their freshman year of college. A sweeter “I will hold your hand when a guy on this earth isn’t” kind of Jesus. A Jesus that is intimate, who whispers peace into our hearts.

Ignoring that my describing different kinds of Jesuses is extremely problematic in itself, I will confess I am someone who would rather wallow in my singleness on Valentine’s Day than get together with her girlfriends and make t-shirts. It’s become a day I acknowledge my relational status and don’t try to make it something it’s not.

Saying I have a Valentine and his name is Jesus seems not genuine. Maybe because I don’t understand the logistics of having Jesus as a Valentine. What would that look like exactly?

I don’t know, but maybe you do. Has Jesus ever been your Valentine?

No Comments

  1. Cindy on February 14, 2011 at 10:31 am

    This may not sound right or come out the way it seems in my head but doesn’t it depend on what kind of love you are expecting or wanting “from” your valentine? i.e. How you define what makes “a valentine” – If you want agape love than of course Jesus is it!! but if you’re looking for eros or maybe not so much 🙂

    • andrealucado on February 17, 2011 at 9:32 pm

      That totally makes sense, Cindy. Thanks for commenting.

  2. Samjosh on February 14, 2011 at 10:50 am

    Well, I had the same thoughts today.. I hesitated to tweet about God’s love in the morning.. IMO, on Valentine’s day people seek earthly love or their life partners.

    Jesus’ love is the greatest love ever! Nobody, not even our spouse or our mother can love more than that. If I say that Jesus is my Valentine, some folks might not understand it.

    yet He is the lover of my soul. So I don’t bother so much about my current relationship status, as I know He takes care of my life. All I wish is, I will be bold enough to share this great love with others..

  3. Katie on February 14, 2011 at 12:20 pm

    The went through this same battle yesterday: Jesus as my Valentine? I finally decided I didn’t like it… mostly because it’s corny. I do like the intimacy it creates with God. After all, it’s Him who makes us whole, not a man. If we’re to be His bride, why can’t He be our Valentine? It’s in the peace and love He gives that I will swallow my pride and accept my singleness today (without making a t-shirt). But I’m really not feelin’ this whole Valentine’s Day bogus. Every day should be about loving one another and being thankful for the relationships we have (romantic or otherwise). In fact, I am mad at myself for wearing a red shirt today… I might go change… excuse me.


    • andrealucado on February 17, 2011 at 9:34 pm

      Ha! I hope you didn’t change. I wore red on Valentine’s Day. I kinda had to for a work presentation but I was secretly glad I had an excuse to be cheesy 🙂

  4. Denalyn on February 14, 2011 at 3:59 pm

    Good question, good thinking & not sure I’d do the tee shirt either. But you are my precious Valentine! Love you always

  5. baBatunde on February 14, 2011 at 11:56 pm

    We need not be overly spiritual abt some simple issues in life.If our heavenly father seeks an intimate relationship with us,and sometimes calls us his bride?It means he wants a relationship with us.We can’t access his goodness n plan for our lives without it.So calling Jesus my valentine is sure on track. Jesus being my val is another smart evangelistic tool,tot- provoking enough to make few curious people wanna ask you why jesus is your val n a good chance to share his divine love n message of hope.For those single girls,thumbs up for you,we need more confident people like u who are not ashamed of the gospel of jesus,the best and only eternal brand.

    Paul says I am all things to all men,n its for a reason ,so that by all means I can save some.Point is our savior is one who can be touched with d feelings of our infirmities cuz he’s been there before,only that he’s a different kinda lover.Let’s not box evangelism,but be creative n yet heavenly focussed abt it.

    • andrealucado on February 17, 2011 at 9:30 pm

      Totally with you on that over-spiritualization thing. It is a fine line we walk.

  6. Shellybell on February 16, 2011 at 4:15 am

    Yes, Jesus was my Valentine. But no t-shirt. (It makes me think of some sort of “Christian feminist march…” 🙂 ) Jesus wanted me to wear some cute new outfit from the Loft. 😉
    As much as I would always (and still do at times) get annoyed with people telling me that Jesus is the husband to the husbandless, I’ve discovered He really is. It has been a remarkable thing to actually experience, even if I’m a little bitter about it. 😉
    So yes, Jesus is even the Valentine to the Valentineless, but that doesn’t stop me from praying that He would bless me with one I can see right in front of me…oh, and one who gives me flowers, oh, and is tall…dark…and handsome…and makes me laugh. 🙂
    Happy belated Valentine’s Day!

    • andrealucado on February 17, 2011 at 9:28 pm

      You bring such a unique perspective to this question. I love that you’ve found that in Jesus–he is faithful. And I will believe with you for that tall dark and handsome. In fact, I will believe that for the both of us 🙂

  7. alliedearest on February 21, 2011 at 6:36 pm

    Valentine’s Day is my favorite holiday; isn’t it the only day that everyone, not just the married or dating, is allowed to celebrate and revel in love?

    I mean, c’mon–what would people think if I ran around wearing pink during September, eating chocolate cupcakes and sending little, glittery, heart-shaped cards to my friends and family with boxes full of chocolate-mousse Peeps?

    But on Valentine’s Day–it’s OK! I know I’d be a super loving and affectionate wife! I can’ wait to have somebody to love–except…I can wait, you know? I don’t want to compromise just so I have “anyone” to give all this love away to. So on V-Day, for just one day, those of us who feel like God has made us for sharing love and joy with another person, get to be as heart-shaped and ooh-aahh-y as we feel like, and nobody bats an eyelash. Valentine’s Day legitimizes me as loving-giving woman.

    But Jesus as my Valentine…I still haven’t figured that out, either. And although Valentine’s Day lets me be the pink-trippin’ love-giver I yearn to be, no day of the year can give me real love back. Only Jesus legitimizes me as a love-receiving woman. So, as much as I love celebrating Valentine’s Day, I think it’s time that I get better at celebrating Jesus as my Valentine, because in a culture that doesn’t consider me a woman among women until I have a ring on my finger and a baby in the womb, I need a daily (not just annual) reminder that I have already been brought into the most important and affirming love relationship of my life.

    In the most intimate moments, moments that keep me sane, Jesus has shown me myself, made me feel seen, heard and alive, and told me,

    “I’m with you always.”

    So maybe next Valentine’s Day, I’ll get my glitter pens out and write on a T-shirt:

    “I’m with you.–Jesus xoxo”


  8. Do You Love Yourself? | English Lessons on February 28, 2011 at 10:06 am

    […] love questions for February. I’ve questioned why we love those that don’t love us back, asked what the role Jesus plays in my love life, and also wondered what to do when love leaves you. But I haven’t asked if you love […]

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