The Ones Who Help Me Figure Me Out

I know these people. But I’m having a hard time finding words to describe them. They came to visit me this weekend. Five of us all together. I had never realized how small my apartment was nor how few bathrooms I had (one). But around these other four, personal space is not usually a luxury. And that’s just fine.

To describe these people as girlfriends, old college roommates, besties…none of that really works. Who they really are are the ones who walked alongside me for four years as I tried to figure myself out for the first time, on my own. And I alongside them. They were with me when I first fell in love, had my heart broken and first lived abroad. They were in the kitchen when I baked/burned my first loaf of banana bread, in my room as I made the terrifying phone call to a boy to ask him to a sorority function and sitting on the coach beside me as we laughed and laughed and laughed our way through those four years of life suspended. College isn’t real, you know.

They still see each other at important events: birthdays, showers, holiday weekends. While I limit my Texas visits to weddings and Christmas. The sporadic nature of our visits would be easier if the “finding yourself” part was done. Without them, I find it difficult to figure out the parts of me left to be figured. But in my mid-twenties I’ve realized there is much figuring still to be done and it is possible, though not preferable, to do so without the familiar faces.

Sitting around at dinner one night, if midnight at a greek deli counts as dinner, I looked at everyone and wondered how we had all met, all become close. How this particular set of people of all the people had become linked. I had no answer. I think very little logic is involved when finding lifelong friends.



No Comments

  1. Katie Axelson on September 7, 2012 at 8:01 pm

    I love this! Mostly because I really miss my five suitemates (well, some days “sourmates”) from my last two years of undergrad. I’ve love a weekend to share my one-bedroom apartment with them. There’s something so right about us being together. So many memories–both good and hard–so many tears–both in joy and sorrow–and so many giggles.


  2. Shellybell on September 9, 2012 at 2:17 pm

    As I have grown and aged, I have seen that true friendship is a way God intervenes in our life. It is precious, it is deep in the soul, it is sacred.
    “A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can see it back to you when you’ve forgotten the words.”
    Friendships are to be nurtured, encouraged, and protected.
    Sweet post Andrea! So glad you have a posse.

  3. tessadoghor on September 19, 2012 at 12:27 pm

    I like…
    very genuine
    no sugar coating!

  4. Bookwormgiraffe on October 24, 2012 at 10:37 am

    how lovely!

  5. Morgan on October 24, 2012 at 7:35 pm

    Having genuine friends is the best..I’ve found that my closest friends are the ones who are sometimes far a part from each other and from me months at a time and when we get together, we just pick up from where we left off. It’s a wonderful thing.

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.